Just Breathe!
With the start of the new year, many of us pause to think about where we are at in our lives, where we want to go, how we show up, who we are being, and who we want to become. We identify the changes that we need to make that will support us in taking our evolutionary leap and becoming the next version of ourselves. Sometimes the changes seem monumental, but sometimes a slight adjustment or a minor tweak can have a major impact.
A few weeks ago, I started teaching a new program called “Breakthrough Shadow Coaching: Training For a Fabulous Life.” In this program we share life skills, distinctions, and concepts that can radically alter a person’s life. The first life skill we discuss is breathing. It is amazing how profound this exploration becomes and how, even though breathing is something we take for granted, many people share that they go through life without really breathing!
Years ago I was told by a personal trainer that I held my breath when I worked out. I knew immediately that this was a reflection of how I lived my life. I held my breath and just powered through whatever situation I was in. Taking an exam in school, leading my first workshop up on stage, hiking up a mountain, or even giving birth, I just powered through, keeping my eyes on the prize and not allowing myself to feel or succumb to the moment. I realized that I developed this habit of holding my breath at a very young age as a form of protection. Holding my breath actually assisted me in detaching myself from my reality, my feelings, other people, and ultimately my inner wisdom or truth.
Many of us don’t know how to breathe. Our breath is shallow or constricted, we can’t breathe down to our bellies, or we even hold our breath. We have become totally disconnected from our breath, which more than likely is a reflection of how we have become disconnected from our feelings, our lives, and the present moment. For some people, like myself, this tendency not to breathe started as a child. I can remember as a child being in the car with my mother and when the windows used to fog up she would tell me to stop breathing. So to be the “good girl” and keep myself safe, I learned to hold my breath, not to be needy, and not to take up too much space. For others, who lived in households where they felt that it was not safe to be noticed or they always had to be on high alert, they learned to hold their breath or breathe quietly as a way to go unnoticed, stay small, or be invisible. For most of us, being disconnected from our breath is a pattern that has developed over time and is the consequence of taking our breath for granted, being checked out of or bodies or our lives, or always listening to that negative internal dialogue that plays over and over in our heads and keeps us stuck in the past, dreaming about the future, and disconnected from the present.
So if you have declared 2014 to be a year of change, start with your breath! Your breath is a crucial vehicle that aids connection. You can use your breath to connect with any part of your body and bring healing and relief. You can use your breath to connect with your emotions so you can start trusting your feelings, your thoughts, your heart, and your internal wisdom and stop looking to the outer world for validation or advice. Your breath is also the most powerful tool you have to bring you into the present! If you want to make 2014 a pivotal year, a year that truly matters in the trajectory of your life, then start by making each moment matter. The easiest and quickest way to do so is by becoming conscious of your breath.
Transformational Action Steps
1. Start observing your breath and breathing patterns.
2. Journal about how your breathing patterns are a reflection of how you live your life. How does the way you breathe show up in other areas of your life?
3. Start experimenting with your breath and see what happens as you start consciously using your breath to shift a situation or your own state of beingness.
4. Create a practice or structure to support you in learning and doing conscious breathing.
With love,
Kelley
